Christian Life, Womanhood

Do You Hang Out With Them?


Growing up is tough. Life that is so simple suddenly becomes complicated at around age 13, and it seems like instead of figuring things out, more and more questions unravel as we get older. What does it even mean to be a woman? But more specifically, a Christian woman? Over the past few years, I’ve been on a quest for answers to that question. I’ve studied my peers, older women in my life, and I’ve read a few books. And I’ve started to find the answer.

A Christian woman, a Godly woman, is one who loves and serves Christ, who grows in her faith, who sacrifices for her family, gives herself and her gifts to her church and community, is an encouragement to her friends, and is a role model to others. Do you know anyone like that? I do, but they are few and far between.

Titus 2 talks about how older women are to teach younger women. And sadly in our culture, the generation gap prevails in our church and community! Young ladies, how many of you intentionally take the time to learn from ladies in your church who are your mom’s age? Who do you mingle with?

The thing is, you’re not going to learn from your peers about life, because they’re searching for answers as well. They don’t have the wisdom and experience that women in their 40s and beyond do. My dear friends, trust me – you’ll learn the most from the prior generation.

You’re not going to learn from your peers about life. Trust me – you’ll learn the most from the prior generation.

Believe me – I am guilty of this as well. I’ve slowly found it to be true. Is it hip and cool to hang out with the moms? Well, maybe not. But is it rewarding? Yes.


And I’m not saying that you’ll be able to perfectly relate to them, or that you should give up on your peers. I have found that having good friends my age has been incredibly rewarding, as I can relate to them like no one else. Especially my best friend, because we’re on the exact same path in life. We can understand each other so well because of that.

But nevertheless, neither of us have the wisdom or life experience that our moms have. We have limited experiences to make decisions from. We haven’t figured out this thing called life yet. We haven’t been through the trials and the joys like they have. We haven’t experienced sacrifice like they have.

So hang out with the moms for a change. Tap a married twenty-something on the shoulder. Sit with the grandma in the back pew. Ask them a few questions. Such as, “What has God been teaching you recently? What have been the hardest things you’ve had to face and how did you grow through that? What were some mistakes you made growing up?” (Although maybe not quite at first. 😉 )

We’ll never be able to live a perfect life. But if we can learn from others and grow from their growth, it will strengthen our faith and our walk with God.

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  • Reply Sarah

    yeah, I totally understand. recently I’ve come to realize this and I’ve been trying to find more time to spend with my mum. thanks for this amazing post, Aria!

    August 29, 2019 at 10:18 am
    • Reply Aria

      That’s great, Sarah! My pleasure. :) <3

      August 31, 2019 at 2:34 pm
  • Reply Sarah Baran

    YES! PREACH IT! Modern culture has this way of sorting everyone into little age-based groups, and it makes me sad that spending time with people who are older and wiser has become “weird.” I think it’s wonderful to have friends your own age, but at the same time, you’re never going to get the same kind of wisdom from them as someone who’s been around the block a few times and has actual life experience. There is SO MUCH we could learn from them, if only we’d listen. (Really, I think having ANY kind of age-gap relationship is interesting, whether they’re older OR younger. I’m 18, but two of my dear friends is a woman in her 70s and a 13-year-old…)

    *happy sigh* It’s so nice to know someone else shares my opinion on this.

    September 9, 2019 at 12:20 pm
    • Reply Aria

      AHH YES! I know I know I knoooowww! I think the culture’s been like this since it started age segregating schools and then that creeped into the church and yeah, there’s so much more I could write on this. XD But it’s so true, and I’m glad you share my opinion too!

      September 9, 2019 at 8:33 pm

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